Two
weeks ago one of our pastors did a sermon on taming our tongue and how powerful
words are.
I
have been at the receiving end of many hurtful words. Words
have power, once spoken they do not easily heal; they stick around for a long
time if not a lifetime. Bruises and scrapes can heal and disappear and
the pain is forgotten, but not words. It has taken me years to deal with some things
that were said to me that I had to heal from and still to this day struggle
from time to time with those popping up and I am in my mid-thirties so it has
been a long road of healing.
Out
of all of the wounds Little R endured words for her were the worst beating she
took. She was told she was not wanted, a bad kid, stupid, not as good as her
other siblings and the hurtful words go on and on. She recalls vividly things
that were said to her but has all but forgotten the physical hurts she has
endured.
Words
do hurt. I am working hard to help Little R overcome these lie’s that she has heard
and believes. I have to be very careful about the words that I say to her as well. I
work daily on encouraging and uplifting her and when admonishing her I remind
her that we all make mistakes and she is still a great kid and dearly loved.
I
have made many mistakes and have had to apologize for words I have said. One
thing I realize though is that as I get closer to God and my walk is stronger I
notice that when I do say something I should not have I often am immediately
convicted and feel the need to think over what I said and deal with it. I love
the power of the Holy Spirit that convicts me so I can right my wrong. I also
realize the power of words as I watch my Little R heal from so much pain and I
am so much more aware of what I say to others and to children as a result.
Words
cannot be taken back. Once they have left your mouth they are spoken and heard
and the damage is done, even if you apologize. Children are very impressionable and once something is
said they often internalize that and believe it to be so. I have a perfect example in my Little R. A girl who struggles with self image, self esteem and believes she isn't worth anything. We have to be so careful to choose our words
wisely and remember to up life our children and acknowledge there good
qualities and remind them daily they are beautifully and wonderfully made in
God’s image. Remind them that they can
be anything they want. Tell them you
love them and think they are the best. Give compliments often and minimize your criticism.
Hug them and hold them and tell them you are so proud of them and the fact they
are yours.
I remind Little R that the words that come out
of her mouth have power the power to up lift and the power to hurt. It is a difficult job to teach a little one
about holding there tongue and speaking with kindness, and not gossiping, but
what a beautiful friend and confidant she will become if she can master this
skill.
Now
if only I can master this first so I can
be a good example to her.
Let no corrupting talk
come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the
occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Eph 4:29
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