Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Swiss Cheese

Have you ever really looked at Swiss cheese?  If you cut right into the center of the cheese you will see that some of the holes go all the way through, some go about half way and then some just barely start at all.
So I was thinking of Little R as a block of Swiss cheese. Go with me here it gets interesting.  Little R has a lot of past trauma and hurts.  Some of her hurts just barely scratch the surface of her memory and some of her trauma history is pretty deep and then some is so deep that it goes straight through and requires a lot more than just a hug and “get over it”.   All of these holes need to be filled in to make Little R feel whole again.   These types of holes cannot just be fixed with a band aid because when we keep cutting we see that we only covered the surface and didn’t get down to the hole underneath.
We have to fill in the holes and fill them up solid; we also will never be able to fill all the holes at the same time.  It will take years to fill in all the holes and even then some will still be left vulnerable to hurts.
When looking at our Little R this makes perfect sense.  She does have hurts that run very deep and others that we work on daily.  Once we realized that this was what we were looking at it made loving her through her anger and defiance and bitterness so much easier to handle.
During Therapy we are finding so many more wholes than we ever imagined.  My heart is hurting for this little girl who witnessed, experienced and was at the hand of so much hurt.  But my heart rejoices for the fighter in this little girl.  She is working so hard to heal, love and trust us daily.
We have a long uphill battle ahead of us but we are taking it one day at a time and filling in wholes as we go. We see God working in amazing ways in this little girl’s life and we can’t wait to see what he has in store for the future.
Psalm 121:5-6
5 The LORD watches over you—
   the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day,
   nor the moon by night.    

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